Light in the Darkness
Light in the Darkness
By Sarah Johanson
Trials, difficulties, problems, and conflicts are inevitable in our lives. We live in a world full of them on a widespread level including (but not limited to) the effects of COVID-19, war, sickness, discrimination, inequality, safety issues, and financial pressures. Additionally, each of us is dealing with our own personal issues which could include loss of employment, disability, loss of a child, abuse, infertility, social pressures, faith crises, death of a parent, etc.
Life is difficult. Finding happiness and peace in the journey is difficult.
Elder Holland beautifully addressed how to approach this in his most recent General Conference talk. “Begin your search for happiness by embracing the bounty we have already received from the giver of every good gift” (Holland, April 2022). Happiness begins by turning towards our Savior. The gospel is so good. Christ is so good!
With that said, it doesn’t mean we still can be sad and confused. Let me say that again. We can have a relationship with the Savior and still experience sadness! That’s how we learn and grow. It’s part of the plan.
In therapy, there are many components of clients’ lives which all therapists assess. In my opinion, one of the most important is a client’s protective factors. A protective factor is any positive influence that helps a client work through the difficult spots in life. These can include coping techniques, relationships, hobbies, values, beliefs, skills, personality traits, and any number of other influences. Protective factors DO NOT prevent or solve problems. They simply allow the person to work through them and come out on top. By focusing on the protective factors in one’s life versus being consumed with the negativity of a specific issue, people can become empowered and more likely to have a positive outcome.
Christ is our greatest protective factor! By turning to Him and focusing on our relationship with Him, we can become stronger and find peace in the sadness, difficulty, and doubt.
We can help others in their difficult journey too! Elder Holland says,
“We must commit ourselves fully to that gift of life and run to the aid of those who are at risk of giving up this sacred gift. Leaders, advisers, friends, family – watch for signs of depression, despair, or anything hinting of self-harm. Offer your help. Listen. Make some kind of intervention as appropriate” (Holland, April 2022).
As we reach out to those around us and simply listen (not try to fix), we can help them find their own relationship with Christ. We can mourn with those that mourn and comfort those that stand in need of comfort (Mosiah 18:9).
I recently completed a training on how to hold space for pregnancy loss. It was facilitated by Amy Wright Glenn who wrote the book Birth, Breath, & Death. Throughout the training, she discussed the importance of companioning through grief and loss. She defines companioning as a three-pronged philosophy – (1) sitting at a table together, sharing, and communing; (2) being present to another person’s pain without trying to take it away; and (3) honoring and witnessing, holding space. Imagine what our lives could be like if we adopted this companioning philosophy and simply showed up for others during their difficulties instead of judging, correcting, and fixing!
Grief and difficulties require anxiety and depression. Without these negative emotions, we couldn’t know what joy and peace feels like. Christ is our greatest protective factor. We can be each other’s protective factors. How blessed are we that we get to go through this crazy life together!? While in Liberty Jail, Joseph Smith experienced some of the darkest days of his life. Heavenly Father comforted him with the following words. “My son, peace be unto thy soul; thine adversity and thine afflictions shall be but a small moment; and then if thou endure it well, God shall exalt thee on high; thou shalt triumph over all thy foes. Thy friends do stand by thee, and they shall hail thee again with warm hearts and friendly hands” (Doctrine & Covenants 121:7-9). We can be Christ’s hand and support and hold up our friends!
In the popular movie Frozen II, one of the main characters, Anna, experiences the loss of her sister, her best friend, her boyfriend, her town, and all her other family and friends. As she’s in the darkest place, she sings the following:
I've seen dark before
But not like this
This is cold
This is empty
This is numb
The life I knew is over
The light's are out
Hello, darkness
I'm ready to succumb
I follow you around
I always have
But you've gone to a place I cannot find
This grief has a gravity
It pulls me down
But a tiny voice whispers in my mind
You are lost, hope is gone
But you must go on
And do the next right thing
Can there be a day beyond this night?
I don't know anymore what is true
I can't find my direction, I'm all alone
The only star that guided me was you
How to rise from the floor
When it's not you I'm rising for?
Just do the next right thing
Take a step, step again
It is all that I can to do
The next right thing
I won't look too far ahead
It's too much for me to take
But break it down to this next breath
This next step
This next choice is one that I can make
So I'll walk through this night
Stumbling blindly toward the light
And do the next right thing
And with the dawn, what comes then?
When it's clear that everything will never be the same again
Then I'll make the choice
To hear that voice
And do the next right thing
I especially love the last three stanzas. What do we choose to do when it’s dark? How do we choose to take the next breath? What light are we stumbling towards? Doing the next right thing can be one of the most difficult things when it seems all is lost and darkness is upon us. It’s ok to be sad and hopeful and faithful all at the same time. There is nothing wrong with you.
Elder Holland closes his talk by reiterating the need for light in this world.
“In a world that so desperately needs all the light it can get, please do not minimize the eternal light God put in your soul before this world was. Talk to someone. Ask for help. Do not destroy a life that Christ gave His life to preserve. You can bear the struggles of this mortal life because we will help you bear them. You are stronger than you think. Help is available, from others and especially from God. You are loved and valued and needed. We need you! ‘Fear not: believe only’” (Holland, April 2022).
